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E-mail Anonymous Mike at zonitics4-at-yahoo.com By Anonymous Mike, pseudonymously.
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Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Ho Ho Ho Well the Griswolds have returned to Phoenix after a fascinating trip to New Mexico.... It's funny how a family acquires Christmas traditions. We made the same trip 3 years ago and due to meal time and gas tank requirements, we ended up opening Christmas presents at a truck stop in Winslow. This year I was up for the same modus operandi but I wanted to do it instead at a truck stop by Holbrook where gas was about 18 cents cheaper. Nope, because of tradition it had to be in Winslow in almost in the same spot in the parking lot as 3 years ago. I should add that the kids wanted to get in a few viewings of a "Christmas Story" on TBS because "it's a Christmas tradition." Of such traditions memories are made. Other observations... What ever happened to shopping mall Christmas trees? Back when I was a wee lad, you could always find Santa in the central meeting spot of the mall under a Christmas tree. Now not only has Santa been shunted over to the side somewhere, usually by a Mervyn's undergoing a liquidation sale (Santa, for Christmas I would like some of those store fixtures at 60% off) but he's no longer under a tree. At the Scottsdale Fashion Square, he's at some sort of "fantasy garden" and I think in Christown he reigns from top of the soft serve machine at the Orange Julius. So what happened to the Christmas tree? Did it go the politically way way of saying "Merry Christmas"? Speaking of Holidays... I always thought the term "Happy Holidays" was a fairly innocent term. For us, the "Holidays" started with the family trip for Thanksgiving and ended after the Super Bowl when Mom took down the Christmas tree. So there you had it... Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, the Super Bowl... the "Holidays." Little did I know that it was all a plan to eliminate the use of "Merry Christmas" and shunt Santa off to a fantasy garden. Oh and one more thing... To the idiot driver in front of me who was going through Flagstaff on Christmas Day in the snow when the visibility was cut to a few hundred feet on I-17. If you decided against the use of any vehicle lights in order to camouflage your vehicle against an air attack or an insurgent ambush your strategy was brilliant. Likewise if you were trying to get me to use as many swear words as possible in front of my children on the day where we celebrate the birth of our Savior, I must say you were incredibly successful. Otherwise... well... I hope you survived to see the New Year. |