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By Anonymous Mike, pseudonymously.

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Friday, November 7, 2008
Chuck, Nancy, and Barney

The election is over and our side lost. So what should we do? How should we compose ourselves?

First before you read any further, go get a beer. I don't care if it's 7:30 AM in the morning or if you are reading this in the middle of class or you are at work- go get a beer. It will make you feel better because as we all know... beer has that kind of power.

First let's talk about you personally

1-A: Go get that McCain-Palin bumper sticker off the car. Nothing over the past 4 years said "loser" more than those idiots who kept their Kerry-Edwards bumper stickers on, so let's not repeat the mistake. Plus my Dad said that depending on the type of bumper, if you leave the sticker on too long you won't ever get it off. He got quoted in a bunch of newspaper on the subject in 2004, plus he has a PhD in Chemistry and is an expert in adhesives. So go get the bumper sticker off.... if not for your car, for your own piece of mind. We lost and we have other work to do; no sense in looking back.

1-B: Go congratulate an Obama supporter. You don't have to be insincere about it, do it just like you did after you lost a game in Little League; shake their hand, smile, say congratulations, and move on. Why do it? There are sorts of civic reasons to do it, but here I am talking about you- it's therapeutic. How many Democrats congratulated you after Bush won in 2000 and 2004? Exactly my point.

1-C When at home with you family, especially in front of the kids, make sure after January 20 to refer to Obama as "President Obama."

Why all of this? Because if you do the previous three steps, you are now light years beyond where many Democrats were after 2000 and 2004. We then had to listen to their insanity for the ensuing 8 years. Look even if the worst happens over the next 4 years, and it won't, it's better to die drunk than insane. So if you have any problems doing steps 1-A through 1-C above, go ahead and have another beer and repeat as many times as is necessary until you can do those steps.

Oh and if you any start acting like the Kos kids or other Democratic crazoids did over the past 8 years, I will personally whack you on the side of the head.

Okay I hope I have you in the proper frame of mind, even if you are slightly buzzed because now we need to plan out the next few months. Let's look at the following steps

2-A: Let's leave President-elect Obama out of this for now. A couple of reasons. First no one wants to hear your belly-aching; times are rough right now and many people would like to pat themselves on the back and enjoy the feeling of electing a black man president and yes it is a historical moment. So let's leave him out of this until he actually says or does something worthy of our contempt and then keep our contempt focused on what he says or does. Second, we don't have to drag our soon-to-be 44th president into this to score some points because...

2-B We can go after his cabinet and sub-cabinet appointments. There's talk that he may appoint Kerry as Secretary of State and RFK Jr. for EPA. The former we all know and the latter is nut-case Chavista; just imagine the confirmation hearings. Beyond the timeline of this post, into the summer the various sub-cabinet appointees will come up for their hearings and they will provide an even more target-rich environment

2-C: Congress. As I have written before, the leadership of the Congressional Democrats are dominated by liberals who have years of frustration built up in an agenda just raring to go come January. Card check and Fairness Doctrine? Cut the defense budget by 25%? Tap into the $700 billion to bail out the auto and airline industry or state budgets? That will play well in the country, if we can get the word out. Remember the Democrats now have to convert their electoral coalition into a governing coalition and any time if you are a Democrat and your Congressional leaders are Pelosi and Reid and with what looks to be 43 Republican votes in the Senate, you have to dread what's going to happen (Jim Wright and George Mitchell they are not.)

The point is President-elect Obama has the honeymoon, not his appointees or Congress. Allow the country to savor its historical moment, but don't roll over and play dead on policy. If President Obama says something objectionable, make note and call him on it but don't get personal; treat him like you would a President McCain. However we know the rough lines of attack and now we need to start mustering arguments and strategies, not belly-aching over a lost election and whether to open a can of whup-ass on David "human capital" Brooks or the squishiness of Peggy Noonan.

Fight for principles, fight hard, fight clean and fair.

There should be a 3-A, 3-B .... that would be a good old-fashioned debate about where the Republicans should go next but that can take place in parallel to the coming battle.

Oh you want a concrete first step? Get some people, young interns will do, and have them shadow the likes of Chuck Schumer, Nancy Pelosi, and Barney Frank whether they go. Every other word out of their mouth offers instant motivation for any Republican

Oh you don't like beer? I find gin works just as well