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By Anonymous Mike, pseudonymously.

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Monday, May 12, 2008
The Perils of Parentage

When I was single, every weekend phone call was an invitation to some form of recreation, some episodes of which cannot be spoken to this day without dragging the name of some respectable citizen (or damsel) through the mud.

However when you are married, it is more than likely that such calls provide nothing but bitter disappointment. Take this past weekend...

The cell phone rings, you note on the caller ID that it might be smartest man concerning beer you would ever know. He's in town and invites you to meet with him at the local brewpub in 30 minutes. You know that not only will good conversation and hilarity ensue but that you will leave the pub full of good beer and quite a bit smarter than when you entered. However there is one glitch....

You are 20 miles across town and your son is at his best friend's birthday party which has another 1 1/2 hours to run. You look to your left, you look to your right, and then you look at your boy having the time of his life. You tell your friend you must sadly decline.

A few hours later you enter said brewpub and your friend is long gone. You and your son belly up to the bar and after each of you have had several beers, or in the little guy's case root beers, you realize that you'll never be to explain to him why some people find NASCAR interesting.

You leave the bar full of good beer and somewhat less smarter than when you entered. Then your kid tells you he had a great day and says despite the fact he finds NASCAR boring to watch on the bar TV, that he likes hanging out with you. Somehow it makes it all worth it, but you wonder how much more fun it would have been with Thomas there too.